Have I Outgrown My Shopping Addiction?
And if so – why, and how the hell did that happen?!
As you know, I’m currently in Australia. And let’s be real – Australia isn’t just the land of deadly creatures (haven’t met any yet, thank god), koalas, and kangaroos (seen them up close and personal – magical!), but also the home of Dissh, St. Agni, A. Emery, Posse, Sir the Label, Camilla and Marc, Matteau, Essen and so many more.
Knowing this, I was highly motivated while packing my suitcase back home, bringing only the essentials (spoiler: still too much). I flew to Australia with one clear mission: shop till I drop. I even warned my boyfriend (not husband—apologies for the typo in the last edition!) in Berlin that, should my suitcase refuse to close, I’d have no choice but to check in an extra one.
And guess how much I’ve bought after three weeks in Singapore and Australia? NADA!
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And it’s not just because I haven’t had time to browse (which was definitely the case in Melbourne – I’ve already kicked myself black and blue over the missed shopping opportunities there). No, there’s something else going on: for some reason, I’m finding it really hard to buy anything right now.
Before this trip, I barely shopped at all this year – aside from two pairs of shoes in Berlin. The plan? Save money for this world tour so I could splurge on local brands once I got here. And now? I’ve already visited some absolutely stunning labels like Deiji Studios, Baserange, Bassike, and the Inca Concept Store – yet nothing has truly spoken to me. Even the super popular Aussie surf brands like Ghanda, Good Karma, and Cotton On – which are way more affordable – haven’t sparked anything in me except doubt.
Why?! I did some serious soul-searching, and here’s what I’ve realized:
Is My Vacation-Self the Same as My Berlin-Self?
That’s the question I keep asking myself. When I left Berlin, it was the dead of winter – I had spent the last nine months in jeans, knits, and boots. Then, after a 24-hour flight, I landed straight into the Australian late summer, where every store is filled with breezy, sun-kissed summer fashion.
In theory, this is perfect — I mean, that’s why we planned this trip for this time of year, right? So I could stock up on pieces for the upcoming European summer. But every single item that looks irresistibly good here – under the Australian sun, against tanned skin, with the flip-flop flip-flop soundtrack in the background, surfers in the ocean, and tropical plants lining the streets – will it actually work back in Berlin?
Of course, I had my moments of weakness. I almost bought a surfer-print T-shirt and a cropped linen set with a tropical print – flowy skirt, tiny top, the whole cool beach girl aesthetic. But before I even made it to the fitting room, I realized: This would be a classic vacation shopping fail.
And trust me, I know those all too well. Says the girl who once bought a mother-of-pearl clutch in the Maldives, a folklore blouse in Greece, and a Pippi Longstocking-style knit sweater in Stockholm – none of which have ever seen the streets of Berlin.
And now that I no longer trust my vacation-self, I’ve suddenly become hypercritical of every single piece I see.
One In, One Out? Can That Even Work While Traveling?!
Let’s be real: after paying over 200 euros in excess baggage fees on our last domestic flight in Australia (I hate Jetstar), I am officially on high alert.
Do I even have room for another piece? How would it fit in my suitcase? And logistically – between four suitcases, a car seat, a stroller, and a kid’s suitcase – could we physically handle another bag? (The luggage cart at the airport is already at max capacity). Even if I’m willing to pay for it, would it even be manageable? (Yes, I’ve done the math – buying another suitcase would actually be way cheaper than mailing a package to Germany and dealing with shippings and costums).
All of this has completely killed my shopping buzz. Because the two things I really want to buy from Australian brands? Shoes and a handbag. And of course, those are the bulkiest, heaviest things possible. So, I’d have to part with things I already have in my suitcase.
For some items – like my white tank top, which is now permanently stained – this is an easy call. But let’s be honest: I specifically packed only my favorite pieces for this trip. And there’s no way I’m giving those up.
Am I Still Stuck in a Style Crisis?
The sudden, very abrupt season change hasn’t exactly helped me shake off my ongoing style crisis. If anything, it’s made it worse.
In theory, I know my style. But right now, I’m struggling to actually live it. With a toddler in the heat, my outfits have been purely practical: Birkenstocks, breezy dresses, tank tops, and wide-leg pants. My chic ballet flats? Haven’t worn them once – I can already sense the blisters. And forget cool layering looks, statement jackets, or fun accessories – it’s just been too hot for any of that.
At the moment, I feel like the ultimate basic mom, shuffling my kid around in Birkis with visible bra straps underneath a dress – especially here, where everyone seems to be under 25, has a sculpted, super tanned surfer body, and definitely doesn’t have children. Let’s just say, this vibe isn’t exactly boosting my confidence … or my desire to strip down in a fitting room. (Because yes, the above description also applies to the sales assistants in these stores.)
Australian women (or at least the ones pretending to be) are triggering all my insecurities. And let’s be real – self-doubt is not the sexy mood you need for a shopping spree.
And in Every Store: Will I Find Something Better?
I swear, I’m not complaining about the length of our trip. But visiting so many amazing places has completely messed with my decision-making.
Yes, this is a stunning summer dress – but what if I find an even better one in the next Australian city? Or in Los Angeles? Or New Zealand? Do I really need to buy it right now? Is this brand available at another stop on our trip? This constant "What if?" mindset has turned every shopping trip into an exhausting game of hesitation.
After my Melbourne shopping disaster (aka, zero time to shop), I refuse to let that happen again. So, I’ve already made detailed shopping lists for our upcoming destinations. Which brings me to my next issue…
I Want to Shop. My Toddler Does Not.
Cue all the moms rolling their eyes and saying, Told you so.
For the longest time, I truly believed my kid would just go with the flow —because I take him everywhere. And to be fair, that still applies in many situations. But let’s face it: we are dangerously close to the Terrible Twos, and right now, stores (especially supermarkets!) are basically Disneyland for destruction.
Everything can be touched, thrown, pulled, jumped on – and, of course, broken. Shopping trips have become the ultimate challenge for us as parents. And since we don’t have childcare on this trip (we are not the Au Pair type), we have to divide and conquer when it comes to working or, well, doing anything alone.
And so far? Every rare moment of solo time has gone to either a silent coffee break or catching up on ten frantic emails. Fingers crossed the rest of this trip is a little calmer – so I can finally carve out more time for myself, my work, shopping, and Substack!
And In the End: I’ve Just Become More Critical.
As I mentioned in a previous newsletter with my style goals for this year, I’ve simply become way more critical and sustainable when it comes to shopping decisions. Thanks to multiple wardrobe cleanouts, flea markets, and the constant packing and repacking of suitcases, I now have a really clear picture of what’s actually in my closet.
2025 Style Goals
New year, new goals – sound familiar? Resolutions are such a January cliché, and let’s be real, they usually vanish as quickly as they appeared. But for me, taking a moment to reflect on what I want to focus on in 2025 really helps. It’s about figuring out where I want to spend more time and energy. And, of course, I’ve got big plans for my wardrobe too…
Light jeans? I already have them in every possible cut. Black jeans? I don’t own a single pair right now! Flip-flops? I’ll only take them in brown – no other color needed.
I just know what I want, what I wear in my everyday Berlin life, what I can easily mix and match, and what makes me feel comfortable – from pregnancy to breastfeeding, from fitness to pure laziness. So now, when it comes to my wardrobe, I’ve got pretty clear preferences – and I’m not swayed so easily anymore.
And that's actually a good thing. I'm excited to see how my shopping journey on this world tour unfolds – and what my first purchase will be (okay, I did buy three pairs of underwear because mine are falling apart thanks to their less-than-stellar quality, but that doesn’t count, right?). Stay tuned – I sure am!
Here’s a little sneak peek of what’s coming your way in the next issue:
We've officially waved goodbye to perfection when it comes to my posting schedule during this trip. But now, you get to decide what you want to read next: